All Creatures from Very Small to Much Too Large for Me by Linda Jean
Life in a small town, where the wildlife outnumber the human residents, can have a storybook quality.
If You Give a Mouse a Cookie
"If you give a mouse a cookie, he's going to ask for a glass of milk." Laura Numeroff
One evening a visiting mouse chewed his way into a bag of hotdog rolls left out on our kitchen countertop. Alas, he found it easier to get himself into this tight spot than to find his way out. (Isn’t that just like Life?) I spotted him just as he began to panic at his predicament, frantically hopping up and down inside the bag. Actually, all I really saw at first glance was a bag of hopping hotdog rolls and I ridiculously thought “possessed!” for a moment before the mouse himself registered in my brain.
Upon hearing my yelp, “There’s a mouse in the kitchen!” my husband Bob grabbed the bag of hotdog rolls á la mouse, then paused ever so briefly to consider his next move. (What DOES one do with a bag of six hotdog rolls and only one mouse?) Bob's thoughtful pause was long enough for the mouse to find his way out of the bag and leap to the kitchen floor. The mouse ran one way, and I ran the other, and my dear husband was left holding the bag.
Now the next time the mouse pays us a visit, I will gladly give him a hotdog roll. But if I do, will he ask for a hotdog with mustard too?
Charlotte’s Web
"Stop your nonsense, Wilbur! If you have a new friend here, you are probably distubring his rest; and the quickest way to spoil a friendship is to wake somebody up in the morning before he is ready." E.B. White
The spiders in our house greatly outnumbered the property tax-paying inhabitants. But while they are Many, they are Very Small, not to mention Good Luck I'm told, so I try to graciously share my space with them. For the most part they amuse themselves spinning webs, or as I imagine, tales to tell each other. Occasionally, one will crawl out from under a pile of papers while I'm writing at my computer, and another might brazenly show up in the shower for a drop of water or two. Those that pass away while in residence are easily vacuumed into the Hoover graveyard to join their relatives who came before them.
One night though, when climbing tiredly into bed, I noticed a spider’s web had been delicately spun from one post to another of our four poster bed. Hmmm ... Charlotte’s bed? I realize that many folks share their bed with their beloved pets, but this furry spider was getting a bit too cozy for me. I had visions of waking in the morning beneath a canopy of sticky web adorned with tasty morsels for Charlotte’s breakfast in bed. So I drew the line that night between sharing my space and sharing a bed, and I gently removed Charlotte's bed from on high.
Big Black Bear
"Big Black Bear came out of the wood, stuck his nose in the air, sniffed something good!" Wong Herbert Yee
While the mouse and spiders are uninvited guests inside our house, we did welcome the American Goldfinches to our yard by hanging out a bird feeder from a large Oak tree. Being experienced backyard birders, we expected the Red Squirrels to invite themselves too, which they did. We were prepared for them though. My husband installed the latest gizmo intended to baffle these energetic, optimistic, and persistent squirrels. It had a pointy top and a brim as wide as a witch's hat. The squirrels amused us with their daring leaps from branch to feeder (oops, almost that is), then crash landed on the lawn and raced up the tree for another attempt.
What we didn’t expect, however, was the Black Bear that stopped by in the middle of a sunny afternoon. When we first moved to the Monadnock region, friends told us to expect to see a bear or two. I dismissed the idea, or envisioned a very small bear at most. A clear case of denial on my part, I realize now. Gazing out the window towards the bird feeder that day, I thought I saw a very large black dog sniffing the ground. But when he stood on his hind legs, at least six feet tall, and yanked the bird feeder from its branch, reality set in.
The Goldfinches sang the alarm and scattered in all directions. The Black Bear comfortably stretched out on the grass in the shade of the tree to lap up the bird seed. I tried to remember the "What to do if you see a (Big) Black Bear" tips from a magazine article I had recently read. Don't look it in the eyes? Bang on some pots and pans? Call my husband? All of the above? Instead, I rapped on the window with a stick; I showed that bear who was boss! In response, he lazily looked ME in the eyes, pulled himself up off the lawn with the sullen look of a teenager asked to clean his room, and reluctantly rambled off.
His next stop? I imagine that our bird seed was just an appetizer on his way to Greenfield State Park, where a buffet of camper's rations awaited him.
Previously published in The Occasional Moose by the Monadnock Ledger-Transcript, February 2006.
If You Give a Mouse a Cookie
"If you give a mouse a cookie, he's going to ask for a glass of milk." Laura Numeroff
One evening a visiting mouse chewed his way into a bag of hotdog rolls left out on our kitchen countertop. Alas, he found it easier to get himself into this tight spot than to find his way out. (Isn’t that just like Life?) I spotted him just as he began to panic at his predicament, frantically hopping up and down inside the bag. Actually, all I really saw at first glance was a bag of hopping hotdog rolls and I ridiculously thought “possessed!” for a moment before the mouse himself registered in my brain.
Upon hearing my yelp, “There’s a mouse in the kitchen!” my husband Bob grabbed the bag of hotdog rolls á la mouse, then paused ever so briefly to consider his next move. (What DOES one do with a bag of six hotdog rolls and only one mouse?) Bob's thoughtful pause was long enough for the mouse to find his way out of the bag and leap to the kitchen floor. The mouse ran one way, and I ran the other, and my dear husband was left holding the bag.
Now the next time the mouse pays us a visit, I will gladly give him a hotdog roll. But if I do, will he ask for a hotdog with mustard too?
Charlotte’s Web
"Stop your nonsense, Wilbur! If you have a new friend here, you are probably distubring his rest; and the quickest way to spoil a friendship is to wake somebody up in the morning before he is ready." E.B. White
The spiders in our house greatly outnumbered the property tax-paying inhabitants. But while they are Many, they are Very Small, not to mention Good Luck I'm told, so I try to graciously share my space with them. For the most part they amuse themselves spinning webs, or as I imagine, tales to tell each other. Occasionally, one will crawl out from under a pile of papers while I'm writing at my computer, and another might brazenly show up in the shower for a drop of water or two. Those that pass away while in residence are easily vacuumed into the Hoover graveyard to join their relatives who came before them.
One night though, when climbing tiredly into bed, I noticed a spider’s web had been delicately spun from one post to another of our four poster bed. Hmmm ... Charlotte’s bed? I realize that many folks share their bed with their beloved pets, but this furry spider was getting a bit too cozy for me. I had visions of waking in the morning beneath a canopy of sticky web adorned with tasty morsels for Charlotte’s breakfast in bed. So I drew the line that night between sharing my space and sharing a bed, and I gently removed Charlotte's bed from on high.
Big Black Bear
"Big Black Bear came out of the wood, stuck his nose in the air, sniffed something good!" Wong Herbert Yee
While the mouse and spiders are uninvited guests inside our house, we did welcome the American Goldfinches to our yard by hanging out a bird feeder from a large Oak tree. Being experienced backyard birders, we expected the Red Squirrels to invite themselves too, which they did. We were prepared for them though. My husband installed the latest gizmo intended to baffle these energetic, optimistic, and persistent squirrels. It had a pointy top and a brim as wide as a witch's hat. The squirrels amused us with their daring leaps from branch to feeder (oops, almost that is), then crash landed on the lawn and raced up the tree for another attempt.
What we didn’t expect, however, was the Black Bear that stopped by in the middle of a sunny afternoon. When we first moved to the Monadnock region, friends told us to expect to see a bear or two. I dismissed the idea, or envisioned a very small bear at most. A clear case of denial on my part, I realize now. Gazing out the window towards the bird feeder that day, I thought I saw a very large black dog sniffing the ground. But when he stood on his hind legs, at least six feet tall, and yanked the bird feeder from its branch, reality set in.
The Goldfinches sang the alarm and scattered in all directions. The Black Bear comfortably stretched out on the grass in the shade of the tree to lap up the bird seed. I tried to remember the "What to do if you see a (Big) Black Bear" tips from a magazine article I had recently read. Don't look it in the eyes? Bang on some pots and pans? Call my husband? All of the above? Instead, I rapped on the window with a stick; I showed that bear who was boss! In response, he lazily looked ME in the eyes, pulled himself up off the lawn with the sullen look of a teenager asked to clean his room, and reluctantly rambled off.
His next stop? I imagine that our bird seed was just an appetizer on his way to Greenfield State Park, where a buffet of camper's rations awaited him.
Previously published in The Occasional Moose by the Monadnock Ledger-Transcript, February 2006.
Comment
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Comment by Linda Jean on June 18, 2008 at 3:53pm -
Hi Danielle, thanks for stopping by. I love children's books of all kinds and have my own personal collection. Still a child at heart I guess.
I think your daughters will love Charlotte's Web when they are old enough, though it is a bit sad at the end.
Linda
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Comment by Danielle York on June 14, 2008 at 9:11pm - I love Charlotte's Web. I just bought it for my two daughters, even though they are a few years away from reading. I will probably read it a few times before they can, just to get reacquainted to it! I also love If You Give A Mouse A Cookie, so cute! i will have to get a copy of the Big Black Bear, I am not familiar with this one.
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